Posted on Sun, 5 Feb 2012
Blow Jobs & Epiphanies
Here’s a story I heard. In mid-flight, a stewardess gets thoughtful and cuts a plate of fruits for the pilots in the cockpit. Knocks on the door and hands it to them. Pilots get really impressed and one of them starts talking to her….thinks she’s really friendly, and tries to chat her up, asking her for dinner at their next port of call. He’s impressed by the effort she put in. After all, she cut not just one fruit, but a few different kinds of fruit. That’s a lot of effort, and great ‘work attitude’.
Pan over to tired mom and one half of an ‘old married couple’ hearing about this story from the Galaxy of Tired Moms. So what’s this with cut fruits? Don’t we cut fruit all the time for our man and the kids who will continue his bloodline generations into the future? Chances are, you’re not going to get a fraction of the gratitude, even if you slow roasted a whole kurabuta sow that you reared from pigling, or sous vide an entire genuine free-range, corn-fed organic cow and served it on a gold platter.
Guess it’s timing – ie. before you’re married – and the salacious promise – imagined or otherwise – of dangerous liaisons. A roll in the hay after a quick harvest of fruit, a clandestine bite at the juicy, promise-filled apple of life. Maybe it’s something we don’t know? Or something we forgot?
Well, turns out, Fruit Platter wasn’t interested after all, and turned down dinner and the prospect of dangerous liaisons for a long Subway sandwich - takeaway, thank you. Pop that down as Epiphany 0001, 2012.
But anyway folks, talking about fruits and vegetables, Bobbi’s Pole Studio is running a series of Valentine’s Day workshops to prep you up for that special day if you aren’t busy cutting fruits for the brood.
On 12 Feb, next Sunday, my fave pole studio is holding a kinky ‘Bedroom Secrets’ workshop from 2pm – 3.30pm for $55 where those of authority promise to show you a few tricks on amping up your repertoire in the old boudoir. After that, there’s another 45-minute workshop (starting from 3.30pm, $30) on giving good hand and blow jobs. No need to shy. Just bring along a carrot, cucumber or banana. No seed to slice.
For details, log onto http://www.bobbispolestudio.com.sg/2012/02/valentines-day-workshops-2/
