Posted on Wed, 22 Jun 2011

What Men Want You To Know…

But won’t tell you… Whether you’re still dating or trying to add extra fizz into your long married life, here are some reality checks and secrets – which our love guru, Karen Khng gleaned from the men she deals with – to what really pushes their buttons!

• Men love a woman who can distinguish between being courteous and being saccharinely sweet… Don’t be a fake!
• Beef up your general knowledge. It’s nice to talk about non-relationship and non-lovey-dovey stuff once in a while. Have an opinion. Be the fascinating, multi-faceted person you are.
• Be thoughtful and sincere to our parents, especially Mommy Dearest. And please – don’t make us choose between the two of you!
• Plan an entire evening out from soup to nuts, and pick out a movie after a nice dinner in or out. Taking charge sometimes is a real winner.
• Eat a real meal and then order the sinful dessert you’ve been craving for! Forget about the “I-can’t-eat-much” bimbo show. Eating like a bird is such a turn off.
• Good manners is good breeding! Go out of your way to be patient, sensitive and caring to people you meet. And, don’t forget your Ps & Qs with the wait staff! In other words, don’t forget to be a lady.
• Have a sense of humor! Be able to enjoy a joke, even if it’s on you! Tease us, be coy and playful. Make our life insanely fun and your company worth having!
• Don’t be one of those girls who squirm when asked to hold a baby or push a stroller. That’s ridiculous. How are we going to have kids then? I can’t do all the hard work! It’s a partnership, for goodness sake!

• It’s a myth that we’re turned on knowing you can’t cook! You may not be Wolfgang Puck, but there’s much truth in the adage “The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”.
• Don’t say “maybe” to everything. Although we love being your caveman/provider, we’re not your brain.
• Nothing turns us on more than a woman who knows what she wants to do with her life, but don’t make your agenda a fighting point with us. Compromises are important. Agree to disagree.
• Accept that men really do think differently from women and stop asking us why. We don’t know and we can’t explain it either. We’re fixers by nature and don’t particularly enjoy a no-holds-barred, ramble-on-and-complain session with no end in sight. We’ll listen for a while, then it’s one ear in, one ear out!
• It’s a BIG turn on when you lead the whole way in bed from start to finish. Oh, and we do really mean finish it.
• Accept that men are truly visually motivated and don’t make us feel guilty. We feel bad about it already.
• Some men like it native, we don’t! When you want some, trim your bush. Smooth is in, pokey is out!
• Understand that we don’t always like it slow and gentle in bed. It takes too long and we can’t (read: don’t want to) hold it in for that long…

Karen Khng is the founder and managing director of Love Script, a bespoke introductions services firm specialising in proactive and discrete Date & Partner Search Services and Unrivalled Date Journeys. Love Script conducts date coaching workshops and organizes Invitation-Only Date Mixers to bring like-minded people together. She brings a pragmatic, intuitive and hands-on approach to matchmaking and believes that relationship readiness and skills are vital ingredients to the success of a union. For more information, visit www.love-script.com or email karen@love-script.com